Gavin was born at 4:11am on August 12, 2008 and was a very sick little boy from the start. The Dr's best guess at this point is that an infection or a virus got to him shortly before birth (could have been days or even hours before birth). This unfortunate occurrence was most likely not related to the TTTS at all (which actually makes all of this even harder to bear). No conclusive evidence has been found to support the infection/virus theory (negative cultures thus far), but the fact that Jennifer's temperature spiked to 101 and she was violently ill the hour or two before delivery strongly suggests it. The premature rupture of the membranes (water breaking) made the twins more susceptible to an infection as well (which we were well aware of). Also, his compromised body functions and subsequent organ failures resembled an infection/virus that was going haywire inside of his little body. Unfortunately, he did not respond to massive doses of antibiotics or antiviral medicine, and his liver and then his kidney's started to fail.
Even though Gavin was sick and struggling, he was full of fight and life for the four short days we had with him. We had a few fleeting moments of hope for him, as he made some slight improvements from time to time, but he truly never made much progress even though he was obviously fighting very hard (surprising all of the Dr's with his determination and his strength). He then sadly started declining as the end drew nearer. During his way too short life, Gavin opened his eyes some, he kicked and squirmed, he reacted to touch and to sounds, he would flinch/jump at a camera's flash, and he was able to squeeze and hold a finger with his little hands up until the moment that he drew his last little breath. Many family members and a few friends got to meet Gavin, hold his hand, speak to him and pray with him. Daddy even got to change his diaper. He was also baptized his second day here on earth.
He passed away laying peacefully holding his daddy's finger while being cradled in both of our arms. We sang lullabies to him and talked to him constantly and kissed him many times in the hours before (and while) he passed. He left us about the same time of the day as he arrived, around 4:15am. His twin brother Colby was just a few feet away. As amazingly difficult and heartbreaking his last hours and minutes with us were, thankfully, it was peaceful for all.
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2 comments:
Thanks for sharing the beautiful story of Gavin's life. I can't imagine how painful that must have been. We've been thinking about you often. Your strength through all of this is truly an inspiration. We love you all!
c, m, j an s
Writing about Grandson Gavin as well as Grandson Colby when both of you had hearts so heavy that it must have been difficult to even catch a breath, posting with such deep emotions and feelings, was a great help to us a we stood by, not as close to the twins as the two of you, but very close---as close as we could possibly get---beginning before each dawn (Grandad) and continuing into late hours of the night (Billie) in prayer, in conversations with family and close friends about the twin's events as each one unfolded. Nothing has changed very much; we are still recalling and remembering as well as archiving your writings which we will visit later, especially at select times, as the years pass.
Granddad and Billie
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